Cars 2

Five years ago the pioneering CGI animation studio Pixar made a cute little movie about cars coming to life called “Cars”. The automobiles had eyes in their windshields and talked through their grills. Celebrity voices such as Owen Wilson, Bonnie Hunt, Tony Shalhoub, John Ratzenberger, and many others became Porsches, Impalas, Jeeps, and so on. The initial audience response and box office profits were favorable, but not overly impressive. However, of all the Pixar films “Cars” gained the most capital through merchandising, so why not make a sequel? “Cars 2” comes out this weekend, but is there a time when these guys should hold back on the sensationalism?

We open on an oil tanker where Finn McMissile (Michael Caine) is an Aston Martin, and you guessed it, a British Secret Agent. The boat is carrying the remains of a former agent crushed into a cube by evil cars, most of which are inferior cars of the 20th Century like the Hugo, Nova, Pacer, Gremlin, etc. Finn manages to snap photos of a new secret weapon disguised as a TV camera, but not before getting chased off the deep end. Not to worry, Finn can convert into a submarine (a James Bond reference). Meanwhile at Radiator Springs, Lightning McQueen (Owen Wilson) is enjoying retirement in peace. However, his oddball friend Mater (Larry the Cable Guy) is stirring up trouble again when he challenges an Italian race car Francesco Bernoulli (John Turturro) to a 3-part international Grand Prix. McQueen has to step in and reason with Francesco but instead is insulted to the point of accepting this challenge. It will all come together in Tokyo, Porto Corsa (inspired by Monaco), and finally London where car races and car chases culminate in plot twists and toilet humor.

As much as I wanted to enjoy this one, I couldn’t. After $5 billion in merchandising sales on the first one, why not make a sequel? Still, even director John Lasseter (Toy Story 1, 2, A Bug’s Life) can save this film from mediocrity. The plot is okay, but the spy theme is sorely out of place. Character development is replaced with action sequences and explosions. Speaking of which, this is also quite a violent G-rated movie. As the cars are living people in this movie, they are crushed into scrap, shattered on choppy waves, even blown up in fireballs. Recreating the 007 vibe is cool, but for God’s sake this is a cartoon! On the other hand we are presented with a timely message on bullying and good sportsmanship, so it’s not a total loss. Still, the real focus is on…

Well daggumit! I was wondering when I wuld get some time in here! How’re ya’ll doin? I’m Mater, Tow-Mater, ha ha. I’m a tow truck, hence the name. Now I’m really the only reason this here movie got made now, because I’m goofy and I make potty jokes, being the stereotype of the ignorant American redneck. But hey, kids love that! Heck I get even more time on screen than the hero McQueen.

Kid’s will likely be entertained for a whole 2-hours, teens will go straight to texting, and adults will be scratching their heads. It’s not that “Cars 2” is worse than any other CGI movie out right now, but for Pixar which has given us such great motion pictures, this is a new low.

1. Sondra wrote:

   June 30, 2011 at 12:54 pm

   Saw it in 3D…it was a cute movie. Took 4 kids, ranging from 2 to 6 and they were all very entertained. There were several parts that made me laugh & just enough plot to keep my attention. Lots of action & a definate 007 feel. It’ll be a big hit with the kids, but I’m not sure it was worth the nearly 6 year wait. Merchandising is gonna be the money maker for this one for sure.

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